My definition of a womaniser is a man who manipulates and deceives many women for their own end, usually a sexual end. They are men that constantly have women around them.
I think we have all witnessed a situation where a woman has been drawn in by and has become addicted to a womaniser.
Here’s a few reasons why some women fall for womanisers:
1) Womanisers are very knowledgeable about women, as they have spent so much time with them. They know that women are often seduced by what they hear and they know exactly what words to say to a woman to make her a) feel good about herself and b) think that he wants her
Womanisers make a significant amount of effort with a woman that he wants and many women love this. It makes them feel both special & wanted but often temporarily. This is appealing to many women but in particular those women who didn’t feel wanted as a child and/or have low self esteem. There are many women in the world with low self-esteem, and this is why so many of them can be drawn to a womaniser.
2) For many women, womanisers are better than non-womanising men as non-womanising men can come across as lazy and disinterested in comparison to womanisers. Womanisers make an effort so women don’t have to risk rejection (to begin with) as the womaniser is so active (initially) that she doesn’t have to make any effort with him and just has to passively agree to go on a date or sleep with him etc. The avoidance of initial rejection is another benefit of a womaniser.
3) Some of the women who fall for womanisers are aware of the other women that he is seeing. Women in this situation often want to become the one to tame him/change him. They believe that if they can achieve this by making an effort with him i.e. looking their best at all times, doing what he wants etc, then it will make them extra special as they have been “the one” to change him. If they manage to change him (which they won’t) then their self-esteem increases significantly.
Some of these women also often believe that they are special because they are the “main woman”. For some it becomes a competition between them and the other women and if they are viewed as “the favourite”, then they consider themselves to be winners. Unfortunately, they are so busy focusing on winning the competition that they fail to notice that what they are competing for is not a prize at all as he is someone who will cause them pain at some point.
4) Some women also like womanisers because they are viewed as exciting and masculine and many women choose partners based on sexual chemistry alone. Unfortunately by doing this, they fail to assess the character of the man and the extent to which they are compatible, which if they did, they would realise that he is not a good option for them.
So in conclusion, feeling wanted & special, excitement, competition and the avoidance of the risk of rejection are the main reasons why some woman will be drawn to and often fall for a womaniser.
What do you think of this article? Do you think that there are other reasons for women falling for womanisers?
Add your comments in the box below
Emma
P.s. If you keep falling for womanisers and want to break free from this pattern, a session with me can help you to achieve that. Contact me at emma@thedatingmermaid.com for more details.
* Please be aware that this blog is intended for general informational purposes only and should not be perceived as professional advice. I cannot guarantee results or be held accountable for dating outcomes based on the content of these blog posts. You use this information at your own risk. If you need assistance with your individual situation, please consult a professional.
I have somehow accepted that my husband is captain save a hoe the reason is because he isnt going out and trying to stay away from me at all actually it’s the opposite but hes constantly on the phone talkung to them on messenger or making himself look single but at the same time he doesnt direspect me in front of any woman so what exactly is he doing and why look someway when that’s not the case ….confused
Hi Laurel,
I’m sorry to have to tell you but your husband is having his cake and eating it. He is enjoying the benefits of having you and is also enjoying the benefits of interacting with other women. You say he doesn’t disrespect you in front of any women but some would say that he is disrespecting you by messaging these women. You don’t say to what extent. Is he actually having an affair or is he only messaging them (even though this is bad enough). Either way, it’s up to you what you accept in your marriage. But be aware that his behaviour will continue until you decide that you won’t tolerate it any more……
I am a man and I can say that most women have always had fatal attraction complex that triggers their mother instincts about bad boys. They love guys who act like cave men around them because they’re bored with the good guy stereotype and they want a walk on the wild side. Problem is as soon as they develop feelings for the bad boy, they try to reform him (usually against his will) and most end up failing in that attempt because millions of women before you have tried and failed. In my opinion, women are just as visual as men i.e. they react more to what they see than what that little voice of caution tells them. Many times, women allow themselves to be dazzled by the bad boy aura and end up getting burned when the ice castle melts in the sun and take out their frustrations on other guys who are not bad. It also doesn’t help that many modern women today are very materialistic and view a guy who spends money on them as relationship material. their abhorrence for honesty and long term devotion to someone is another problem