The Two Mistakes Women Make If A Man Doesn’t Call Them After A First Date

Pink Phone WomanImagine the scene……….you go on a date with a man and really enjoy yourself. He also indicates that he’s having a good time and says that he will call you soon as he definitely wants to see you again. He’s keen, your keen. Match made in heaven you think…………


You are aware of the three day rule in relation to calling so you know theres a chance that even though he was keen, he might not call for three days. Three days roll by and you haven’t heard anything but thats expected you tell yourself. Another day rolls by and you say to yourself “he’s playing it extra cool” but that’s ok as you know what he’s doing……


5,6,7, days roll by and now your starting to stress out a bit. You start telling yourself that he must have been busy as he did mention on the date that he was busy working on ___________ (fill gap with any project that he mentioned on the date).


He hasn’t called after a week (or maybe longer) and you start to ask yourself “what shall I do?”.


Lets face it ladies, we all know this usually means “shall I call him to see whats going on?”


These are the two main mistakes that many woman make at this point:




They take it really personally that he hasn’t called and start to believe that there must be something wrong with them. They therefore make the mistake of believing that their worth is based on the inaction of one man who they don’t know very well. This indicates a lack of self esteem and I have to admit, low level craziness. The error that women who do this are making is doubting themselves to such an extent that they believe that an almost stranger determines their worth. This simply isn’t true.


To these women I would say

“If a man doesn’t call you it is not a reflection of your worth, especially as you are the same person whether he calls or not so you can’t be someone of worth if he calls but not someone of worth if he doesn’t. You are just the right woman for someone else, exactly as you are. you live with yourself 24/7 and you know how cool you are, what a great girlfriend you can be, what a great daughter/mother/colleague/friend you can be. He’s only known you for a limited amount of time, how would he be able to tell, how cool you are after one night? There are many men out there who make very snap, judgemental decisions about women way too quickly and then end up missing out on a woman who could have made them very happy if he hadn’t been foolish enough to make a rash decision”


Mistake #2


Call him or text him. This could even be as casual as a “hi, how are you text”. Lets be honest though ladies, this text is usually used to either remind him that you exist or prompt him to arrange another date. Hey, we’ve all been there!


This is a mistake because men are naturally hunters. Men usually love the thrill of the chase. In fact I have heard that men don’t like it when you call them/have sex with them “too early” as the chase, which they love so much, is over. Coupled with the fact that it shows that you are very interested in him. If you reveal this too early he starts to lose his attraction for you. Men to earn her time and attention


The painful truth is that if he doesn’t call, it’s because he isn’t motivated enough to call which usually means that he isn’t interested enough, despite what he said the last time he saw you. Always remember to focus on his actions (calling) rather than his words (the ones he uttered during the last date). He just doesn’t want to chase. If you were the woman for him he would have made the effort to call. For the woman that he wants, he wouldn’t be too busy to call as he would be worried that he would lose her if he didn’t make an effort as all men know that if they don’t make an effort with a woman they like then they may lose her (often to another man)


If you are in this situation. Ask yourself these questions?

  • Do you really want to chase a man? (If you do, how will you ever know that he is really interested in you?)
  • Do you want someone who is probably coming along for the ride rather than actively wanting you? (I’ve even heard a fair few men say that they don’t like women calling as they perceive it as chasing)


Hey ladies, you and I know that in fact, it’s just a call but some men can get a bit melodramatic about something so small, but that’s the way it is. So, to men calling = chasing = desperate. They find it weird and think that you just want a boyfriend or a ring, rather than them as a specific person


Best thing to do is to move on and make an effort to find a man who wants to be with you to the extent where he will be motivated to call you consistently. That man is out there, you just have to get out there to cross his path.


I hope this blog has helped

Until next time – Take care

Emma xxx

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by Emma Staddon on January 11, 2017 · 0 comments

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